This is the first time I've been able to sit outside on my deck and hear the birds and not be smothered in sticky sweat in months... I think it's actually in the 80's today, and it is a lovely treat to feel the sun, the gentle wind and actually hear the wind chimes sing their gentle melody. Today brought me a wonderful treat of meeting a new wise woman. She is 89 and full of life or "piss and vinegar" as granddaddy used to say.

She has seen a lot, lost a lot and continues to live a lot. She continues to choose to embrace the fullness of life- though it is at times extremely painful- the loss of a loved one, the horrible illness a close friend faces- she has been a witness to both the best of times and the worst of times and yet she is strong, optimistic and smart as a whip.

It's interesting to me how God continues to bring people into my life to help me see that you can indeed survive more heartache than you ever imagined.

I am about to be a grandmother for the 2nd time... I am full of trepidation as the relationship with the mother of my grandchildren is strained to say the least. I have absolutely no control and I hate that feeling. I am angry at myself, my lack of control, and her. I love my granddaughter dearly and deeply with an expansiveness of heart that I never dreamed of.

I want to run away and escape the heartache that relationships bring but I know that I can not nor will I choose to run. I believe that "love bears all things, hopes all things, endures all things. I believe that Love never ends. ( Corinthians 3: 7-8) I believe all of it- but somehow right now, I am not feeling the "Peace" that this truth- ought to bring to my heart and soul.

Van Morrison's poetry sustains me right now: There's a love that's divine, and it's yours and it's mine and it shines like the sun, and at the end of the day we will give thanks and pray to the One"

So, I give thanks for this day. That is all I know to do.